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Avengers assemble!

03 May 2019
Author   Jackie Wilson Asheeke
Avengers: Endgame took in US$1.2 billion worldwide (to date), becoming the #1 earning movie in at least 54 countries, including Namibia.  On its first day, it grossed worldwide, $643.7 million.  Compare that with the #2 grossing first day film, Captain Marvel, at $350 million.
In writing this review of a popular and beloved movie, I feel like everyone else must know something I don’t.  For me, the entire thing was over-played, slammed together to end open story lines, and was overly long.   I actually yawned during the many unnecessarily lengthy dialogue exchanges.
The entire thing needed maybe 2 hours, definitely not 3.  I wanted to shout, “Get on with it!”
Spoiler Alert!
I loved seeing superhero stars and support characters in every frame.  I loved jumping around time and the universe as the characters assemble the infinity stones to use them in the present which is the future (yep…time travel is always convoluted). 
You know what annoyed me the most?  Seeing a drunk, bearded, belly-fat Thor.  Nooooo…I refuse to accept that.  That man is the god of Thunder, not the god of Laager.  Seeing a half-naked, buff-bodied Thor is what I drooled for in the year since the last Avenger’s story.  Marvel denied me and demoted him to a running gag.
Another confusing point is that Captain Marvel was touted to be the game changer for Endgame, but, she wasn’t.  Oh yea…she had some dynamic scenes in a great battle ending storyline (though she arrives late), but the success and failure (after her predicted rescue of Tony Stark who was dying and lost in space) of the plan to roll back time was not due to her participation. 
Can someone tell me what in the world was Pepper Potts doing wearing an iron-man-style outfit and fighting in that last battle?  We had badass women superheroes already…plenty –we didn’t need the CEO of Stark Industries! 
I cheered Valkyrie (from Thor movies) on her Pegasus, The Scarlett Witch (from Avengers movies), General Okoye, Shuri with her high tech panther claw-guns and the entire Dora Milaje from Black Panther, Black Widow, The Wasp, and Captain Marvel.  Girl power on steroids!
The whole downer for me, (other than no six-pack on Thor) was that it was completely illogical for Thanos, WITHOUT an infinity stone, to be as physically powerful as he appeared.  No way, that this god-complex bad-guy, can defeat three of the strongest Avengers (Iron Man, Captain America with Mjolnir [like wow! on this point], and Thor with Storm Chaser) on his own without the purple power stone.  No – not believable. 
The ending scene of Captain America bringing the stones ‘back’ in time and then staying in the past can never work with the personality and justice and duty obsession drive of Cap.  NO WAY, that he stays living cute with his Agent Carter in the post WWII era in their own little house and there is no Captain America to save people. 
Then, there is the entire unbelievable premise about time.  Half the living beings in the universe disappeared; this movie picks up five years later and then at the end, all those billions return to where they disappeared from?  Nooooo.
Can you imagine billions people, living with the de-population mess for five years – energy usage, all systems, housing, food production, economy, social issues …everything painfully scaled back for five years and then, poof! The billions of living things reappear (wildlife included).  In the short-medium term, what will they eat? Where will they live, get jobs, heal broken marriages, move around…what?  I despise illogic in movie plots. 
Why not let TIME roll backwards to the moment BEFORE everyone disappeared?
Still, as a consummate Marvel and superhero fan, I enjoyed Avengers: Endgame, even though Iron Man and Black Widow die and Vision doesn’t come back to life. 
This is probably the last Avenger’s movie for this generation, so go see it on half price Tuesdays at Ster Kenikor and enjoy it.   - This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.